Live for Self?

(Thursday Night Before David’s Funeral-in a plane)

In America it seems that if you aren’t making choices that benefit either you or you family, they aren’t good choices. I’m not sure that is biblical…because when I read the bible I hear Jesus calling us to live a sacrificial life. I just can’t get over the picture of my Savior not having a place to lay his head. Here is a thought, “how about mankind, especially Americans, (To whom much is given, much is expected) make choices that benefit the good of society and not self. I guess there are pockets of this type of thought that is somewhat mainstream as we think about the movement for sustainable farming, and others, but overall our individualistic society says we need to be “me” focused. At the beginning of this week, I found out my uncle had shot and killed himself. As I gathered information about why this occurred, it appeared he was very stressed out about a second home that he and my aunt had bought to relax and enjoy nature. This has led me to contemplate pretty hard about what God values. The word “sacrifice” keeps coming to my mind, not the word “self.” Are we truly happy if we consume more and more because we can? Does just because we can mean that we should? Because a lot of Americans have such an abundance, does that mean that it is ok to buy a second home, a second car (for yourself), a television for every room, and the list continues? I’m not asking this question to judge or to put down individuals that do, I’m just asking a question for people to think about. What is a better life? I remember my parents reactions when I told them that I wanted to move to the inner city. They felt that I was stepping on the American dream and spitting in their face. They thought if I raised children in the inner city I would be depriving them of what my parents worked so hard to give me. Is this true? The best word that I can describe 4 years after I made this decision is the word “rich.” But, if some people would look at my life they may say that I am sacrificing some things that just doesn’t make sense to do, but all I feel is “rich.” How is that? I’m not talking about rich in the monetary sense, I’m talking about rich being the feeling that I experience as I go through life experiencing many cultures and many beautiful people. How do I feel rich when I’m trying to live what ones would consider sacrifice? It doesn’t really make logical sense. In order to get to this richness, though, you have to get past the surface. I think in our consumeristic society we have created this acceptance of superficiality and it may be a bold statement to say consuming things creates shallowness but I truly feel there is a connection. What I can’t get out of my mind and my heart is that I’m unsure we are fully taking Jesus up on his offer in John 10:10 to give us life to the full. Do we understand what he was saying? The conclusion that I have come up with in my life so far is that when I don’t live for self, I seem to feel more full.